‘Adventures in Paradise’ Romantic Comedy (Hackgate) Screenplay – Better than Leveson and a lot more fun!

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Hello all … europabridge writing to you from Boston about a screenplay set in gorgeous London … ’Adventures in Paradise‘ my Hackgate screenplay draws from various inspirations and sources to create a mixed genre film I hope will break box office in 2014.  A romantic comedy-revenge caper that I like to call the ‘feel-good movie of the year’ for people with brains, the screenplay is highly polished at 130 pages, and completely original in the way it looks at the events of Hackgate.

The first draft I produced in 24 days in July/August after Hackgate broke in the press, in response to an OP/ED Dan Hodges wrote in The New Statesman defending the NOTW,  because, he argued, all of us ‘want and need’ this kind of snooping to get the news.

Though Hodges (notorious for his provocative rhetoric) might have been writing in jest … what a rebuff. I wrote a response, more like a protest, which inspired me to write the first draft of my screenplay, and started me on this project that has gone through enough twists and turns (lost on a crashed hard drive for half a year and finally recovered) to merit its own screenplay.

Clive Reade, written for Colin Firth, is the celebrity window through which we experience Hackgate. Aurora, a reporter, provides another window, which helps Clive understand how his life has become fodder for the vultures of the press … Together, they conduct something like their own Leveson Inquiry, but it’s a lot more interesting, entertaining, and fun. In fact, I would argue that it might actually be helpful for people to see the issues Hackgate raised dramatized and somewhat resolved in the cinema … as,  I do not expect any major changes to be reflected in the way the press handles its affairs due to Leveson.

Aurora Blunton is a combination of the spirit of Audrey Hepburn and well, Aurora herself. I believe she is a fairly original character – dreamt up from my own depths.

Clive Reade, a billionaire hotelier with his own brand of 5* hotels and resorts similar to Relais & Chateaux or The Viceroy 5* Hotels and Resorts, is a Modern Renaissance Man, combining the best of the old and new worlds. ’Adventures’ achieves a hybrid form of film entertainment … lighthearted, funny, romantic, satiric, tender, beautiful, and at times justifiably savage, brutal, dark, and surprising. And there is that overused word: gravitas.

As I made little adjustments during revisions, I was always amazed at how quickly it moves. ‘Adventures in Paradise’ works exactly like a true romantic comedy, and yet it also has plenty of suspense, action, and fast-paced glamour (like racing a Bugatti along the A1 in Lake Geneva).

If you loved the screwball comedies, and the comedy of manners of the 30′s and 40′s, plus a bit of Hitchcock, ‘Adventures in Paradise’ will be right up your alley.

Still, ‘Adventures’ is as contemporary as anything I’ve read, due to the way I’ve structured it. There are several opening sequences, and four endings that will keep people guessing about what’s happening, though I have tried not to be clever for the sake of being clever.

No surprise, I am looking for an agent in the UK or an agent in the US who has the power to reach over the pond, as most of the roles were written for British actors, though there are a few key roles for Californians – most notably bad boy Trent Cortigan, who I would love to see played by Taylor Kitsch. The major shooting location is London of course, with other supporting scenes in Cambridge, Cornwall, Geneva, Los Angeles, Santa Barbara, and various luxury islands like Anguilla, and the Maldives.

Why is ‘Adventures in Paradise’ so internationally-based? In my travels over the past few years I covered a lot of ground and decided to balance the locations between Global, US, and UK interests … So I imagine some of the global aspect could be captured at Pinewood Studios, and I am looking for financing internationally as well. beau_rivage_geneva_06

Beau Rivage, on Lake Geneva, to the right, a location where a brief but gratuitously glamorous scene in ‘Adventures’ is set.

As far as financing is concerned, I did not intend this, but in the course of writing a screenplay about the monied, glamorous power-brokers of a certain international set, I keyed products associated with their lifestyles into the story. It was only after I finished the script, I realized I had a goldmine of possible merchandizing or branding opportunities. Scoff all you want, the new James Bond film Skyfall was financed in totality by its use of the German beer Heineken.

Bugatti, Corvette, Rolls Royce, Stella Artois Beer, Bud, Tattinger’s Champagne, Graff Jewelers, Prada Sunglasses, Ray-Bans, Valentino Couture, Armani, Louis Vuitton, British Airways, Blackberry, Nokia, and IPhone are among the products featured throughout ‘Adventures’ … sometimes for intentionally comic effects – no less effective, by the way. Perhaps what I need is an amazing lawyer who knows how to wrangle a merchandizing deal.

Oh, and I’d like to hear music by Michael Buble, David Bowie, The Beatles (Polythene Pam), The Pretenders, The Eurythmics, Captain & Tennille (for a stalking scene), The Clash, Ralph Von Williams, Lorenz Hart, Jerome Kern, and George Gershwin on the soundtrack. The Adventures in Paradise CD could sell incredibly well, and go on to become a hit. Happy thought!

Emma Freud has said Richard Curtis is tied up, but I think he’d make a fine director for this kind of material. ‘Adventures in Paradise’ (registered with the WGA) needs a directorial eye keenly adapted for comedy, drama, suspense, romance, caperish spoofs, and stylish film-making … And so I also thought of Ang Lee, Joe Wright, Tom Hooper, or Mike Newell. And since Tom Hooper has worked with both Anne Hathaway and Colin Firth, maybe he’d be a natural for ‘Adventures in Paradise’.

After all, my dinner party, at the end of the third act, is filmed down a long formal table seating 30 people, needing many reaction shots and matching cuts. This has never been accomplished – not in Downton Abbey, Upstairs Downstairs or Gosford Park. I think I have out-glamoured and out-poshed the poshest! P.S. There are many scenes in cars, limos, and on the phone in limo’s or cabs, so who’s up for some hand-held action in the backseat alongside a tracking shot?

If you’d like to read about how I wrote the character of billionaire mogul Clive Reade, click here. It’s no secret I wrote ‘Adventures’ while combining the best of two British film personas for beloved Clive – with the flavor and balance coming out in favor of Colin Firth. I believe Firth has the dignity, chops. and intelligence to carry off such a major role, as he’s on camera as much as 90% of the film.

Suitable for our times, I’ve resurrected the 80′s soap opera uber-bitch in Diane Gregory, a major player in the tabloids fiasco. And I’ve even asked for Joan Collins to appear in a cameo in a Michelin star restaurant in London during a major scene with Clive.Colin+Firth+colinfirth21

I wrote the role of Clive Reade to win an Oscar, for whomever ends up playing him, and there could be other nominations as well.

And Diane Gregory and Aurora Blunton are tour-de-force roles …

Diane is selfish, unforgivable, and unpredictable but still somehow lovable. Frankly, I think Emily Blunt would eat this role up and then ask for seconds, and she’d get it in my sequel – ‘Return to Paradise’ – now in the works.

Aurora Blunton has to be brilliant, beautiful, funny, and irresistible – perfect for Hathaway … I don’t know that we’ve seen such a character on the big screen since Kate Hepburn or Audrey Hepburn.

By the way, it’s useless to resist, as I’ve written the movie hit of 2014 …

MUSIC UP –

‘Adventures in Paradise’ a story of tabloid vandalism set against great wealth, poverty, rancid cynicism, corruption, betrayal of decency and innocence … with many great comic turns … Clive and Aurora find redemption from the tabloid life through their adventures together … and love.

Continue to scroll down to see other blogs on aspects of ‘Adventures in Paradise’ – a film I know many of you will love to experience again and again in the movie theatre … Hope to see you there.

Thanks for stopping by europabridge … RT ‘s appreciated!

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NOTE: I do not claim ownership rights to any of the photographic or graphic materials used to illustrate my ideas or represent persons, places, or products (like hotels, restaurants, teddy bears, or yachts) when blogging about ‘Adventures in Paradise’, or my other screenplays or various ideas at europabridge.wordpress.com. I do claim absolute authorial copyrights for my screenplays, and for all the literary works I have written for television and film, as well as for short stories, or novels, and anything I discuss here or tweet about on Twitter. When tagging photos, I have tried to be descriptive or to refer to the website where the photo was featured. Many photos are in the public domain; others were being used in the same way I use them – on blog sites or fan sites – simply to represent persons or as a tribute to their personages, or to suggest certain possibilities. No photo is ever used to malign or harm a person’s reputation. The one exception to this is my reference to former President Richard Nixon, in my Died of TV Guide blog. However, as he resigned in disgrace from the Presidency, for snooping, I would hope my use of his photo would make sense in the context of my critique of freedom of speech, invasion of privacy, and the creation of an enemies list.

What do Colin Firth, Hackgate, Mr. Darcy, Valentino Couture & 30′s Comedies Have In Common?

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Hello all … europabridge, scribe here … reporting to you from Boston. But on to the point of ‘Adventures in Paradise’.

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‘Adventures’ (registered with the WGA) loosely based on the events of Hackgate, weighs in at some 130 pages. That’s a little over two hours in the theatre, as the script works very much like a puzzle, and moves very quickly.

I’ve had a wonderful time writing Clive Reade too as a sort of Darcy – returned to our era – impossibly rich (billions), literate, articulate, brave, funny, and wise. Oh yeah … handsome, generous, sexy, incredibly well-mannered, manly, as well as being an impulsively reckless Bugatti driver, drawing comparisons to Cary Grant.I wanted to create a new screen icon in Clive Reade, since film viewers, especially female viewers, want to see some combination of Cary Grant and Mr. Darcy stroll into a make-believe world, and transport them to a place where people speak in more than common utterances … After all, Judd Apatow’s movies cannot meet all our needs, and Clive Reade is an Olympian hero compared to this scale of comedy.

Essentially, I’ve created a wonderfully complex character, who is not so much perfect, as he is lovably imperfect - nearly always catching up with who he needs to be to face the challenges my screenplay throws at him. He is betrayed horribly but survives, in a Buster Keaton way, and then makes a brilliant comeback – most importantly, without using machine guns, Kung Fu, taking out a ninja squad, destroying a bank, killing his ex-girlfriend, or blowing anything up.

How does Clive Reade do it?! He has something almost extinct in our age: character, instinctive grace notes, and intelligence.

The long dinner party scene at Clive’s Belgravia Square mansion is a tour-d-force filling some 30 minutes of the film and culminating in a final coup that’s funny, surprising, savage, and poignant.

‘Adventures in Paradise’ draws on many sources: British RomComs, the 30′s Comedy of Manners (Nick & Nora, Hildy & Walter, Susan & Dr. David Huxley), Hitchcock’s stylish whodunnits, some Evelyn Waugh, Noel Coward, Dickens, and social satires like Network. I hope I’ve shown my indebtedness to old Hollywood, without wriing a clunker.

The truth is the story has plenty of action, just no gratuitous violence, still, it constantly shifts focus to keep you guessing in the midst of some complicated and pace-paced developments. (My promise: no Chinatown-like mazes though I do admire and love this film a great deal.)

The look of ‘Adventures in Paradise’ also interests me, as it is important to the overall concept of the film … And so I have searched the web for images that inspire me and reflect a kind of Contemporary-Retro look, which I have interpreted as Classic. The above lovely staircase I found in a mansion on Lyall Street in Mayfair, London … But if Richard and Anthea Sylbert were working still, I’d certainly hire them.

The dress I want Aurora Blunton, writer and love interest to Clive Reade, to wear at the dinner party with Clive in London: Valentino couture found in Vogue.

A young sophisticated woman, Cambridge-educated, beautifully turned out – stunning in any context – Aurora is disastrously out of place at The Sentinel (tabloid) where she lands due to a frame-up, boondoggle, and betrayal.

Her progress as a major player in the London scene, and her character development are issues I carefully crafted in writing her.

Possible casting for Aurora Blunton … Anne Hathaway or perhaps someone in the UK I am not yet aware of?

Finally, I’ve started the sequel ‘Return to Paradise’ which will continue the caper in just as interesting ways. The opening of ‘Return’ is a knockout - featuring a gorgeous wedding at Brides’ Cathedral on Fleet Street in London, and other events unfolding globally, that will grab your attention for another easy two hours with Clive and Aurora in the theatre.

Will Aurora Blunton-Reade wear Vera Wang or Sarah Burton - the Dutchess of Cambridge’s designer? And yes, Aurora was written with a nod to Kate Middleton – the smart brunette.

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Location, Location, Location – Cornwall UK – ‘Adventures in Paradise’ – Hackgate Screenplay

29 Sunday Jan 2012

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Hello all … europabridge scribe and author of ‘Adventures in Paradise’ Hackgate romantic comedy-revenge caper screenplay now writing and tweeting away in Boston …

A brief post about locations in ‘Adventures in Paradise’ as there are many, and for good reason.

Before I returned to the US, I covered perhaps as much as 100,000 miles in my travels, and conceived of my Adventures screenplay as a way to revisit my vision of the world as seen from the perspective of airplane windows, taxis, ships, hotel rooms, trains, and other transportation modes — in a more global than local view of life. Frankly, local sucks.

I’ve also used the script at times as a postcard of sorts, and promotion for travel to the UK, because I am happiest when traveling – especially in the UK and certain parts of Europe – Switzerland, Sweden, Denmark, Germany, Italy, France …

So … ‘Adventures in Paradise’ features major settings in London (ten), scenes in Cambridge (village and campus), the Cornwall Coast (two), as well as Lake Geneva, Los Angeles, Santa Barbara, and various island retreats like Anguilla, and the Maldives … Clive Reade, my hero, conveniently owns a luxury hotel-resort chain similar to Relais & Chateaux or The Viceroy 5* Hotel and Resort Luxury brand.

Durdle Door, Dorset … Ancient ancient coast … The picture-postcard approach to filming ‘Adventures in Paradise’, once the romantic aspects between Clive and Aurora heat up, greatly appeals to me, and I think it appeals to many film-goers. Some of the most successful films have had vibrant LIVE locations, (and the single industry not to experience a slump during the recession - growing some 40% – TRAVEL.) I love and stand by the idea of an international film that will also provide tons of bonus travel features on the companion ‘Adventures in Paradise’ DVD boxed set, with a special emphasis on travel to the UK – along with interviews with the actors, Director, and other creative cast and production crew about their impressions of the shooting areas, the locals, and attractive features.

A solumn promise, however: there will be no 3-D version of ‘Adventures in Paradise’, as we do not need to see a pastie in 3-D!

Or do we?

At any rate, because I’m enamored of the Cornwall Coast (home to Le Carre, Agatha Christie, and Daphne Du Maurier), I want some of the romantic sequences in ‘Adventures’ to be filmed there, in addition to a scene featuring my Cornwallian Chef -Clarence Stapleton in his new restaurant – COVE.

The romantic aspect between Clive and Aurora in ‘Adventures’ is somewhat submerged, and may be more of a subplot, due to the fact that Clive and Aurora do not come together as a couple until some 90 minutes into the story … all while avoiding each other, bumping into each other, and finally discovering they actually LIKE each other. You might chart their progress like so: starting as enemies, becoming wary colleagues, very good friends and Hackgate-tabloid investigators-adventurers, and finally a couple. Actually, their relationship becomes one of the vehicles for how the film solves its many mysteries. This is why I call it a Romantic Comedy-Revenge Caper …

So … after unraveling a number of tabloid boondoggles and mysteries together, all quite taxing and exhausting, Clive Reade and Aurora Blunton take a long weekend in Cornwall where they wander around … Fistral Beach, Newquay, St. Ives, Polreath, Penzance, Fowey, St. Mawes, or Scilly Island … Clearly the DIRECTOR and LOCATION SCOUT’s choice but I’m voting for Scilly Isle, (as William and Kate did on their honeymoon.) I’m using a montage technique in the Cornwall scene between Clive and Aurora, so that at the end of their long weekend - after rowing, walking, golf-carting, chatting, and dining - Clive and Aurora fall in love.

Is it the friendly people, great seafood, excellent wine, stunning landscape of Cornwall, or removing themselves from the madhouse of the London paps that finally seals their fate? And can American audiences wait that long to see two stars like Colin Firth and Anne Hathaway fall in love? Clive Reade and Aurora Blunton?I am not exactly a pushover but even I was bowled over by this lushly romantic, long weekend they share on the Cornwall Coast …. alongside scones, Earl Grey Tea, pasties, seafood, bushels of English roses filling every vase to overflowing … the wind from the Cornish coast blowing through the windows, and finally, the two lovers surrendering to each other’s considerable charms. 20090124165035_cornwall_1 skmagazine

 

If you want to find out more – check out my Screenplay for the Adventurous blog to see who I’d like to cast in all the many interesting and challenging roles I’ve written for Adventures in Paradise.

And FOLLOW & DM me on @europabridge1 on Twitter …

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Screenplay for the Adventurous – ‘Adventures in Paradise’ Hackgate Romantic Comedy-Revenge Caper by europabridge

23 Friday Dec 2011

Posted by in Screenplay Adventures

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Hello all … europabridge author of ‘Adventures in Paradise‘ the Hackgate romantic comedy-revenge caper screenplay.

Thought I’d tell you all a bit about my casting ideas for the screenplay, an original work recalling aspects of Network, To Catch A Thief, Charade, and British ROM COMs, as well as Hollywood Screwball Comedies … (and that’s more than enough for now).But before I do that, I thought I’d offer a few thoughts about this winning shot of Audrey Hepburn from Charade one that I’ve cribbed for my Twitter profile, as well.audrey hepburn sepia

What interests me about Charade mostly is the balance between a sadistic world (mob-like murders), and the charms of the two leading stars whose charisma and humor keep the film from toppling over into a twisted exercise in Grand Guignol …

After all, in dealing with Hackgate, as a romantic comedy-revenge caper I’ve had to bypass the heavier issues, such as the death of Milly Dowler or the McCann tragedy or the heinous murder of Daniel Morgan … not because I lack the chops to write a darker film, but because I saw an opportunity to have fun with a landmark media case.  My rationale, not unlike the writers who wrote the Screwball Comedies of the 30′s was to provide a bit of fun at the expense of the creeps. In short, we see the evil-doers get their asses kicked, we feel better.

And of course, I also wanted to avoid lawsuits. People’s lives have been invaded enough … They certainly not need no further invasion by me.

Still, people do break the law in ‘Adventures in Paradise’, they have intentions that are anything but honorable, and lives are ruined – in the sense of being cheated, invaded, slandered, humiliated, and mocked. But still, the film hero and heroine (Clive and Aurora) discover who the culprits are, set the media and legal hounds upon them, and live another day to  … well, you’ll have to see the film when it opens – in 2014 – to find out more.

I have written about who I think would be interesting main casting choices for ‘Adventures in Paradise’, and so I wanted to share my ideas about casting possibilities for Adventures.

After all, I have a polished screenplay ready for some genius agent, director or producer – weighing in at 130 pages – and a sequel – ”Return to Paradise’ in the works.

And both feature tabloid lunacy, stalking, blagging,  hacking, Hollywood farce, romantic betrayals, comedy, sniveling idiotic villains, glamorous cars, drama queens, world travel, 5 star hotels, resort and restaurants, Dickensian struggles, and love.

And it’s all lots of fun, really.

After spending many months crafting the role of Clive Reade, I’ve decided Colin Firth is the best candidate for this incredible man of the world … A win/win situation, very good deal, indeed.Colin Firth represents an obsessive aspect of Clive Reade … A man who is so absorbed in his empire he doesn’t realize he is soon to be engaged to a world-class uber-bitch … A man who deserves only the best, and gets it in Aurora Blunton. A man who can wrangle billions while speaking poetry with aplomb (though not very often, as we do not want Americans throwing up popcorn and KitKat bars in theater aisles). A man who can trounce a villain at a dinner party with his singular wit, while throwing legendary parties in London. A man who can romance an intelligent, lovely young woman, and win big despite getting punked by an uber-bitch. A man who travels the world via private jet, drives a Bugatti around Lake Geneva, and acts opposite some of the very best talent around … Jesus Christ, will someone buy this script from me, so the world can experience Clive Reade? Next to Daniel Craig’s James Bond, this is the British man of the 21st Century, in my opinion.

Aurora Blunton … Aurora is written for a woman in her early thirties, so she’s not an ingenue but her experiences in the tabloid trade have put her in a vulnerable position … Later she emerges clearer, harder, and diamond-like after her caper-like investigations with Clive remove the junk from their lives.

I don’t want to reveal too much but surely what happens to her at The News & Times, The Sentinel, and in between reveals a scummy tabloid underbelly which stands for being assaulted by the media.

An actress I’ve thought of as a perfect match for Aurora but who would also bring her own unique qualities to Aurora is Anne Hathaway, also featured in other of my blogs.

It’s easy to see her deliver the comedic aspects of Aurora, as well as a heady romantic side, and the more serious qualities in scenes with Clive, and in the media.

But let someone else sort it out.

By the way, if you could somehow meld the directing talents of Richard Curtis with Ridley Scott, you’d have the perfect director for ‘Adventures in Paradise’ …

Though sometimes I have a hard time wrapping my mind around Love Actually wedded with Gladiator.

‘Whenever I get gloomy about the state of the world, I think about the arrivals at Heathrow Airport’ (Hugh Grant V.O. as PM) … ‘Are you not entertained?’ (Russell Crowe as Maximus)

Or how about this unlikely hybrid from Four Weddings & A Funeral and Alien:

‘It’s hell out there … Matthew’s trapped with an evangelist from Minnesota’ … ‘I admire its purity … A survivor unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality.’ Ha.

It’s difficult to weigh the entertainment value these directors have delivered over the years, but surely these few films alone have done double-duty.

In the way of co-starring roles, there are many … I once tried to tally or roughly approximate the number of roles in ‘Adventures’ including extras, and came up with something like 250 players.

For your consideration, James McAvoy.  I’ve enjoyed the Scottish actor’s work in Starter for 10, The Last King of Scotland, and other rougher ventures, and would like to see him cast in my film. Originally I thought he’d make a convincing Dorian Grey-like Robert Bullock, smoothness on the surface — bristling with menace underneath … But I changed the age of Bullock to make him a contemporary of Clive Reade’s, so McAvoy is too young. Perhaps he can play Enid, one of those complaining academics - unintentionally hilarious because the world does not match their data … Mr. McAvoy, would you care to play a gay man who argues constantly with his lover about over-eating, and provides useless bits of information at dinner parties to everyone’s feigned astonishment? Of course you would.

After I had aged Robert Bullock somewhat to be a contemporary of Clive Reade’s, (which the plot needed), I thought of many actors, who could play him, and settled on Rupert Graves. 600full-rupert-graves He would expertly chew the scenery with Colin Firth, and with whomever is cast as Aurora Blunton … But there is also a key scene that he’d have a ball with, and that is the party scene on Portobello Road near the end of the film. This is the kind of front-page Daily Mail tabloid news bust that’s somewhere between La Cage and Richard III … My romantic-comedy revenge-caper might need a ‘R’ rating. I hope ‘MPAA’ will do.

Taylor Kitsch for the role of Trent Cortigan, a character who uses Diane Gregory for the sole purpose of causing grief in Clive Reade’s life, in one of his many intrigues to include spying, hacking, stalking, and blagging. This is the kind of bastard role Paul Newman perfected in films like HUD — except Trent has incorporated Gordon Gecko’s philosophy, and gone him one better. See him in Gaga’s Boys, Boys, Boys video. I loved Taylor Kitsch in John Carter on Mars too …

Another key villain role is that of The Mustachioed Man or Loman – tabloid stalker, hacker, smarmy self-important snoop, and prat-fallist who conveniently supplies the film with someone to loathe and laugh at, and he comes with a sense of self-righteousness too. Jack Black has the kind of self-absorbed mania and comic potential to take the role of a despised stalker and make it a winning role – a lasting impression of comic villainy. jack-black

Michael Buble. I like his vocal qualities, and would love to hear some of his music used throughout ‘Adventures’ because his voice is so … well, bubbly, velvety, and upbeat.

I also want him appear at Clive’s private dinner party bash toward the end of the film to sing A Foggy Day in Londontown.

Buble runs circles around Sinatra any day. michael-buble1

Speaking of legends, David Bowie in a cameo at the end of the party scene in ‘Adventures’ – sitting at the shiny white grand piano plunking away at the chords of FAME - makes a lot of sense to me … And people would jump at a chance to see him as there is simply no one in the world like him.

While guests are milling through Clive’s beautiful Belgravia Square mansion, I’d like Bowie to appear suddenly, wordless, and sit down at the piano …

Elizabeth Hurley ActressElizabeth Hurley is a possible candidate for Diane Gregory for two reasons. I thought of her sex appeal and sense of danger when I wrote the role, and felt casting her as someone who stupidly ditches Clive Reade for a younger man would create a kind of irony … And she has the kinds of *balls* to pull it off …

Emily Blunt would also be a great choice for Diane Gregory.

Already she has turned in so many varied roles it is clear she could pull off an outrageous role like Diane, and still have film-goers enjoy her exploits. This really is the key to Diane: Outrageous but somehow still being likable. This is why, by the way, people loved the evening soap stars like Joan Collins – a sense of fearlessness on camera that Blunt definitely has in abundance.

Blunt would also understand how to work her mojo for Diane Gregory making her an interesting character to follow in my sequel – ‘Return to Paradise’.

Did I mention Prince Albert makes an appearance in ‘Adventures’? He appears in a portrait in Clive’s penthouse, and serves as a kind of silent guardian over Reade’s life.

Julia Ormond is suggested for the possible cast because I was reminded, after reading an interview with her in The Guardian UK, of her obvious talents. Think she would be fine in one of the two key roles in the very long dinner scene (20 minutes) at Clive’s mansion on Belgravia Square: Margot or Eleanor … But I am leaning toward Margot, world-famous mystery writer, comic, caustic, self-obsessed … full of ripping retorts. And it would be a wonderful change of pace for Ormond.

Put that woman in a slinky silver gown, put a martini in her hand, and let the show begin!

After reading about Emma Thompson’s EFFIE, I realized my treatment about the Pre-Raphaelites (focusing on other artists in ‘Kelmscott Manor‘) somewhat parallels hers and Greg Wise’s material. Then I recalled Thompson’s screen persona, and promptly plumped the role of Eleanor (no coincidence), an investments person/friend of Clive’s.

Frankly, the dinner party scene is a tour-de-force, and having women like Julia Ormond and Emma Thompson cast in ‘Adventures’ will create an even bumpier ride.

Other supporting roles written for major British talents, where they might parade their skills at dinner party banter include: Dame Maggie Smith, Christopher Plummer, Michelle Dockery, Gillian Anderson, Richard Grant, and Dudley

emma-stone-ny-mag-cover-2And I’ve written a supporting role for Emma Stone, in a reprisal of Judy Holiday, as a clueless financial adviser at Clive Reade’s dinnerWhoever directs ‘Adventures in Paradise’ will have his/her hands full with 30 dinner party guests, and dialogue at the table and throughout the mansion, and even cameos by the pets.

Look, I had as much fun as I could writing this script … knowing there are people out there who have not sold their last brain cell into bondage, and can still enjoy a really well-made comedy-caper set in London … and other fabulous places around the world.

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I inserted this photo just for laughs. Taken at Starbucks; obviously pink underwear was the thing to wear that day. No role for this guy in ‘Adventures’ though. Sorry, apply elsewhere.

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Supporting Pet Cast … ‘Smokes’ has so much class she has her own made-to-scale Victorian divan in Clive’s luxury penthouse apartment. She also has her own booster seat with seat belt, in which to ride in the limo … She speaks French, bien sur, and will no doubt start a rabid trend toward adopting grey Persian kitties. In addition to this, she gets along famously with a miniature Italian greyhound pup of Aurora’s …

Introducing ‘Tippy’ (yes, a reference to Hitchcock).  She has a non-speaking role, nonetheless she is an important addition to the Reade/Blunton household, as buddy to ‘Smokes’, TV critic, and unilateral dispenser of wise sound-barks … Plus, her toenails make a pleasant tapping noise on Clive’s hardwood floors.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is that all? Not really …

  • LOCATIONS

There are nine major shooting locations, one of them Geneva in the Pregny Chambesy canton … Nothing could spoil this view!Lake-Geneva-001

Thanks for stopping in @europabridge … source of amazing screenplays for the adventurous.

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Clive Reade – Tabloid Drek into Academy Gold and Box-Office Champagne

10 Saturday Dec 2011

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Hello All …  europabridge scribe here, author of ‘Adventures in Paradise‘ the Hackgate romantic comedy-revenge caper screenplay. I believe I’ve nailed the 18-86 age niche film market in my feature film, and though I am heavily biased toward educated film-goers … Hackgate Smackgate, it’s already a classic!articles hem,passegen.se Firth

At times it has been a bit of an exhausting process creating Clive Reade, who I fully expect to go down in film history as the answer to all women’s needs – after Mark Darcy and Cary Grant, of course. And I really did study the nuances of British speech when writing ‘Adventures in Paradise,’ though to be honest, I’ve been studying them all my life, as I began reading Shakespeare at the age of seven.

When I wanted Clive to exude an impossible decency and romantic gallantry, speak a line or two of poetry, as well as bestow a huge Graff diamond on Aurora Blunton, I wrote dialogue and action thinking specifically of Colin Firth. And I drew some inspiration from other British RomCom actors like Hugh Grant, while also looking at Matthew Macfadyen and Clive Owen. But basically I decided the role was so thoroughly engaging, and demanding that Colin Firth would not only tackle it but nail it.

And then I put Hugh Grant in a cameo at Clive Reade’s (Firth) dinner party, where all of London converges on the evening of a great unmasking.

My overall intention in writing Clive Reade was to create a character so thoroughly likable by both men and women, that people will pay to see ‘Adventures in Paradise’ several times over in the theatre, and then run out to buy the DVD Boxed Set with Special Bonus Features - including a documentary on Hackgate, excerpts from the Leveson Inquiry, a Travelogue of all the shooting locations, including London, Cambridge, Cornwall, Lake Geneva, Bel Air, West Hollywood, Santa Barbara, Anguilla and the Maldives, as well as some interesting bits and pieces from all the actors and the Director’s Commentary.

Colin Firth would have a challenging task, as Clive Reade is nothing if not daunting in terms of how dominant a role it is.

Clive Reade in ‘Adventures in Paradise’ (registered with the WGA) requires whingeing on occasion, Buster Keaton goofiness, gallantry, romance, occasional brutal wit, and a mean right jab … as well as stature, and skillful maneuvering of a Bugatti around Lake Geneva … ultimately winning big for himself, Aurora, and the Empire.

Who wants to pick up the Oscar for Best Film (as Producer)? Best Actor?

Gentlemen, take a short bow:

‘Well, thank you all very much. I am so very honored to accept this Award from the Academy, but must take a moment to thank all those people involved … especially europabridge, scribe stranded in Podunk Vt and Boston, Massachusetts for an inhumane length of time … all while penning such a remarkable script – not to mention the sequel ‘Return to Paradise’.

Ahem … Don’t mention it, guys.

Hey, that’s me to the left as a naive struggling actor in LA.

Henry! (butler in ‘Adventures’) More drinks all around! I feel a new era of film-making about to dawn … I hope whoever directs ‘Adventures’ will let me quietly observe – off in a corner somewhere … sipping my glass of Pouilly Fusse.

That tall middle glass looks large enough!

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Died of TV Guide – Leveson, Hackgate, and Press Reform in Adventures Hackgate Screenplay by Elan Durham

22 Tuesday Nov 2011

Posted by in Film Scripts, Screenplay Adventures, Social Reforms

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Hello all … europabridge here … author of the original Hackgate screenplay ‘Adventures in Paradise‘ and other projects … MFA, ex-academic, traveler, and future dweller in London, Scotland, and Cornwall, I hope.

A few thoughts about why I’m on Twitter after I tried writing a post riffing on the old 60′s and 70′s social commentaries, and died of TV GUIDE … Still, after following the Leveson Inquiry and the Hacked off! Media Reform Rally in London, and following people and events on Twitter, I thought I’d add some thoughts relating to my own Hackgate-inspired ‘Adventures in Paradise’.

Though I am interested in Hackgate, the Leveson Commission, and fairness in the media, as well as in social life, for the record, I am not a social revolutionary, (or even a Socialist). For instance, I’ve not attended an Occupy protest, though I support any nonviolent effort to protest issues that do need addressing. The last protest rally I attended was more than a decade ago – peopled by millions of men, women, and children in Washington DC who were concerned about women’s reproductive rights. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton spoke there among many other notable non-terrorist or anarchic influences. As this topic is unfortunately still alive (when it should have been settled decades ago), I hope any controversy concerning the right to privacy or other indisputable civil rights is put into its proper context, just as the right to decide what to do with your own body is also put into a proper 21st century context.

However, rather than imagine a world where all inequalities or absurdities are erased, which is impossible – I’d like to imagine a world that functions with a sense of fairness and reason, as opposed to being guided by a predominant ethos of all the spoils going to the rottenest, f**k ‘em, we only live once.

Bernie Madoff, and his cronies who preach a pound of flesh (your first-born or your mother) have become models for a bankrupt economy, every human being merchandized to feed the Machine. They rob the system, such as it is, of integrity. They rob people who have done nothing but make the fatal mistake of believing in some inherent decency seem like utter and complete fools … Like me.

But what does all this specifically have to do with the Leveson Inquiry, Hacked off!, and press reform?

I am reminded of Dan Hodges original response to Hackgate in The New Stateman. Yes, Hackgate happened, and it will happen again because the people want it. They want to hear Hugh Grant‘s conversation, they want to capture those tunnel death photos of Princess Di, and they want to know who’s shagging whom, in the ever-shifting power plays of Hollywood, New York, Washington DC, London, Paris … because don’t you know … ‘Nobody rides for free … Pay up or play!’ By the way, I heard an old buzzard say this last winter in Vermont, after which I stepped behind a bush, vomited, cleaned off my mouth, and then went about writing ‘Adventures in Paradise’. You can’t please everyone, and some you especially want to avoid pleasing.

Information is knowledge. And misinformation is also a kind of power that can be used against whomever we want to harm or control for political purposes or financial gain, and as I have learned over the course of the past several years – sometimes just for malicious sport.

Misinformation surely is one of the most powerful tools of all …

‘Reputation, reputation, reputation! O, I have lost my reputation. I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial.‘ What remains is bestial after your privacy, name, family, career, and person have been invaded by these sociopaths for ‘the right to know’. ‘How to malign as a way of reshaping the social, political, and economic landscape’ might be a more apt title for our information-age. Most people know about my story in some NOTW lurid version, which would perhaps include the long-lost academic career of Clifford Irving in Woody Allen’s version of my life – looking more like Zelig everyday – complete with Scarlett O’Hara’s kidnapping by Big Joe to be auctioned off in Shanty Town to Carpetbaggers – alongside livestock or abandoned pets from Mormon Animal Shelters … (Anyone got an extra dog cart? I need to go to Canada.) Will the real Elan Durham please step forward out of the steaming morass of unholy shite?

Writing ‘Adventures in Paradise’ rather than many more polemical letters to unresponsive editors (130 to be exact), or blogs, for that matter, the result is much more entertaining, witty, and enduring than a rant. Perhaps it is also my tribute to the women who dared to forge ahead in Aurora Blunton. She is my very own Leveson Inquiry.

Aurora c’est moi! Sorry Flaubert, such an abused turn-of-phrase.

Aurora Blunton is also a celebration of the kinds of female characters I grew up looking at in movies with Audrey Hepburn, Katharine Hepburn, Carole Lombard, Greta Garbo, Irene Dunne, and Myrna Loy … She is at once light as a feather, has the gravitas and intelligence of a British barrister, and the appeal of a major movie star. Only in my movies!

‘Adventures in Paradise’ is a statement about the life of the community, the press and its standards; celebrity, the pursuit of any story no matter how fabricated, absurd, and ludicrous, and the glare of the limelight … Some of the themes I’ve observed, and endured since the private life was abolished around the year 2000. (Thanks to an Irish lad busking about London for the provocative photo below).Hacking, stalking, expressions of online hate, and tabloid gossip go much deeper than aspersions cast upon a person’s appearance, political views, or status in the community or world.

They represent concerted efforts to change the course of human history by creating an acid so strong that it etches away, and destroys all evidence of civilized life, such that no human witnesses remain. Perhaps this is the legacy of the McCarthy era and Nixon Administration, after all.

What kind of world do we live in when characters like Paul McMullan mingle together to conjure up a thumbs up or thumbs down agenda for whatever hapless dunk-drunk draftees ends up in the docket of world doom.

Can’t you just hear the roar of the crowd? See the fists with down-pointed thumbs? Unholy wieners & stale beer! Talk about fascist populism.

Even Tony Blair’s PR guy Alastair Campbell couldn’t escape menacing threats. And the British public subsidizes this kind of hooliganism, with more than half a billion dollars of tax pounds per year?  

Thus, ‘Adventures in Paradise’ is my response, a fleet-footed film for people with enough brains to think, also a window to escape through for a few hours, to have a laugh, or the last laugh … For the rich, the poor, the press, the hard-pressed … hopefully to live on in the public imagination for decades.

And, by the way, ‘Poncey’ Hugh Grant has demonstrated he is nowhere near the ‘bitter oleaginous’ figure The Daily Mail caricatured in their smear campaign, though really, anyone who has been stalked for decades by the tabs might be said to have every right to be bitter.

Never in my lifetime of more than half a century have I witnessed so much violence, so much rancor, and so few civil amenities from the press or from our so-called civil order in America, where I am presently grounded.

What does it mean to be fully human, and can a press begin to approximate the values necessary of preserving society?

Heavy questions indeed, which is why I chose to write a romantic comedy-revenge caper lightly based on the facts of Hackgate, rather than a Watergate-style expose.

Perhaps we can all agree upon one thing: At the end of the day, people need a break from reality. I do not trivialize the events of Hackgate in ‘Adventures’, but rather place them in a context people will enjoy watching, a context which will endanger no one, and that still manages to address all the key issues while entertaining, distracting, and yes, (gulp,) even instructing.

Finally, it is probably more accurate to call ‘Adventures in Paradise’ a dramedy – a mixed genre film sprinkled with romance, revenge, satire, glamour, travel, tabloid intrigue, corruption, and betrayal – one that ends happily for my hero and heroine. I love the way the story ends – every moment of happiness hard earned and believable.

Clive Reade: Nothing If Not Daunting discusses the challenging nature of the role, which puts the actor in all but perhaps 30 minutes of the film.

Click on this link to read a bit of dialogue between Clive and Aurora in a phone conversation.

Thanks for stopping by europabridge … And feel free to Tweet, repost, or reference in your own blog with an acknowledgment to @europabridge1 on Twitter …

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Clive & Aurora Meet — Dinner Date Scene — ‘Adventures in Paradise’ A Hackgate Romantic Caper by Elan Durham europabridge

15 Tuesday Nov 2011

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Hello all … Breaking news from europabridge, scribe and author of ‘Adventures in Paradise’ Hackgate Romantic Comedy-Revenge Caper screenplay …. firth_hathawayx-large

As some of you know, my screenplay based on the events of Hackgate set in London, Cambridge, Cornwall, Lake Geneva, LA, Santa Barbara, and various other locations is essentially all there at 130 pages.

If this film does not make 326 million pounds worldwide in the first few months of box-office – long BEFORE rentals – then I know nothing about movies.

A brief scene from “Adventures in Paradise” follows.

By the way, in case you wandered into this blog unawares, part of this material originated in a letter I wrote to Dan Hodges in the UK protesting his editorial which rather pooh-pahed the events of Hackgate. His offhand OP/ED incensed me, but at any rate definitely inspired my screenplay.

Why is my script 130 pages long? Because there is a conspiracy, and where there is a conspiracy there are necessary subplots, many characters, and resolutions which need sorting out – unlike your typical romantic comedy.

ADVENTURES IN PARADISE Elan Durham @europabridge1 (WGA registered.)

NOTE: This scene is satirical in context, as the viewer knows Clive is accusing Aurora of more than she can reasonably take responsibility for. He’s also whinging a bit, and feels guilty because he has done something dastardly to her that she knows nothing about - yet. However, he more than makes up for all these intrigues later on when they meet.

Finally, I’ve not bothered with camera instructions or anything technical in terms of focus … This blog is all about the push-pull dynamic between Clive and Aurora, which becomes the basis for their later compromise, and massively compatible relationship.

SCENE

INTER. CLIVE’S EATON SQUARE PENTHOUSE/FLEET ST/AURORA’S OFFICE/THE SENTINEL — DAY

PHONE RINGS 

Clive is online, absorbed, studying some properties, while also checking a printout. He blindly picks up the phone – somewhat distracted.

CLIVE

Yes, what is it? (catches himself) Bloody hell, Reade here.

AURORA

Mr. Reade, I was just thinking just the same.

CLIVE

Thinking what? Who is this?

AURORA

Aurora Blunton — of (embarrassed) The Sentinel. And I bloody hell hope you won’t hang up on me.

CLIVE

(long silence …)

Ah yes, what do you want now, Ms. Blunton? And how did you get my cell number?

AURORA

Please Mr. Reade, I’d like very much to take you to lunch. I’ve some explaining to do.

CLIVE

Lunch? … Are you joking?

AURORA

No. I want to explain how your life ended up on my desk, if apologies are accepted at this point -

CLIVE

(cuts off)

Well, it’s rather late in the day for that, don’t you think?

AURORA

And … to ask a favor.

CLIVE

I see. Well, favors are usually granted to friends and family and you fall into neither of those categories.

AURORA

Perhaps … But I was hoping …

CLIVE

No hope possible, I’m afraid. You screw up people badly, you defame them through the tabloids, you make absurd allegations about my finances and emotional and mental states, and continue the assault for weeks, whilst yours truly takes cover from the slings and arrows your pathetic rag creates with endless storms of piss and shit – and inside my own penthouse no less – only to be compared to that lunatic in Castaway -

AURORA

(interrupts)

I had nothing to do with that ‘Castaway’ bit.

CLIVE

Doesn’t matter! And to add insult to injury, you have the nerve to ask me for a favor, as if I were a mate of yours from school.

AURORA

Mr. Reade, I would never impose upon someone with whom … I have so little claim – the obligations of friend -

CLIVE

(interrupts)

Your facile self-justifications only expose the degree to which your profession has sunk into the muck and the mire. (bloviating) Grow up, Ms. Blunton!

AURORA

Well, now that you put it like that, I would have to agree … I feel like the biggest horse’s ass in London.

CLIVE

Horse’s ass? Well really, I never implied you were a horses ass – actually.

AURORA

Further, I apologize for ever having troubled you, Mr. Reade, and will ring off now.

CLIVE

(beat)

You didn’t answer me. How did you get my cell phone number?

AURORA

Someone at The Sentinel gave it to me. I told them I needed a scoop.

CLIVE

Someone at The Sentinel! Well, do you?

AURORA

A scoop? Not in the least.

CLIVE

Really?

AURORA

Honest injun.

CLIVE

All right then, I suppose I’ll concede a brief meeting.

AURORA

You will?

CLIVE

Yes, but Diane Gregory is off limits. And so is that whole bloody affair.

AURORA

Yes, of course. Thank you! All right then (breathing, consulting her computer), how do you like 1:00 this Monday, Mr. Reade?

CLIVE

(consulting his computer)

Can’t make it, noon on Tuesday?

AURORA

Tuesday? No, I’m sorry, I’m afraid that won’t work either, as I have a meeting with my Editor-in-Chief I can’t break – yet.

CLIVE

(piqued)

How about later – say 2:00?

AURORA

I also have a deadline for later that day, Mr. Reade … How about Wednesday at 1:00?

CLIVE

That would back up to my Solicitor’s meeting.

AURORA

Well, Thursday I have an assignment in Shepard’s Bush – and Friday I’m returning to Cambridge to see my mom. But I could cancel that and -

CLIVE

(suddenly intrigued)

Ms. Blunton, what would you say to dinner with me Saturday evening?

AURORA

Dinner?! As in eating food at night?

CLIVE

Yes, as in eating food at night, unless you’ve more important business scheduled for snooping, Ms. Nosy Parker –

AURORA

(interrupts)

Absolutely not, where do we meet?

CLIVE

I’ll pick you up at your place – be ready at 7:00. Whereabouts do you live?

AURORA

Bloomsbury Square, #15, Mr. Reade.

CLIVE

Ah Bloomsbury. Looking forward to hearing what that favor is all about, Ms. Blunton … See you on Saturday.

AURORA

Ta!

CLIVE

(ludicrously stern)

Ta.

INSERT TABLOID HEADLINES

READE AND BLUNTON BURY ANCIENT BLOOD FEUD! BOOK DINNER DATE! BLUNTON GOBSMACKED! READE FLUMMOXED! NEWS AT 12:00.

CLOSE ON – CLIVE

CLIVE

What the hell came over me?

END OF SCENE

This is one of the earlier scenes which set the tone for Clive and Aurora falling in love (90 minutes into the film), despite an industry that blackened both their lives – leaving them no way out – except with each other.

Oh, for crying out loud this is a screenplay not a documentary, so lighten up … It’s a neat little puzzle that works perfectly but only in the logic of the movies.

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Diatribe against defensive posturing (I’m not British) Seed of ‘Adventures in Paradise’ Hackgate Screenplay by europabridge

11 Tuesday Oct 2011

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Hello everyone, europabridge here … reporting from Boston.

This blog concerns the letter I attempted to post at the New Statesman in response to Dan Hodges blog there … which they did not print. I can’t imagine why but I think it’s relatively interesting that I knew right away NOTW would go down.

Dan Hodges in  New Statesman July 7: “The Phone Hacking Scandal is a Disgrace. And it Will Happen Again.”

“And those other co-conspirators. The great British public. Phones are bugged because we want to read what’s on them. Police are bribed because we want to hear the stories they have to tell. Politicians acquiesce because despite out strenuous denials, when they tell us how to vote, we listen.”

Using my letter as the basis of Clive Reade’s complaint against Aurora Blunton in my ‘Adventures in Paradise‘ screenplay, this, in essence, started me on my quest to create the perfect blend of satire, romantic comedy, and revenge caper, and you can read that here. It also became useful in a BBC conference statement I have Aurora Blunton present in a scene where she busts her newspaper ‘The Sentinel’ for Hackgate-like actvities … Exciting stuff.

Letter to New Statesman: (Probably around 7/7/2011)

Dan Hodges facile, unctuous self-justifications only expose the degree to which his profession has sunk into the muck and mire. Come clean? Impossible! ‘We’ll be back!’ … The toxic heroes of misinformation, public shame and blame are guaranteed a living, ladies and gentlemen, whilst the rest of us are stuck feeling merely human with our outrage.

In fact, ‘we’ do not want your caviling; nor do we want you hacking into phones–unless it happens to belong to an international mobster, terrorist, or someone like Bernie Madoff …

Further, the NOTW is not indispensable. A paper with better standards may come along to replace it, and I hope that it does so soon.

And as far as the Guardian being on ‘its last leg’, a debatable claim at best, this must be due to the fact that it has not been complicit in bugging everyone’s arses in the UK.

That Hugh Grant did more to expose the sleaziness of this practice (along with The Guardian) speaks volumes about the press; give him the bloody Orwell since journalists at various other venues were too busy justifying the thuggery of a new era of lawlessness.

Mr. Hodges, may I make an observation? You stink with your “Ain’t it lovely that we’re really rotten, but the public is even worse and stupid to boot because they give a crap. Another round of drinks for our colleagues at International News!”

Regards, Elan Durham

Oh dear. Well, it was a big deal … and still is.

By the way, I follow @DPJHodges on Twitter, and we have since discussed Hitchcock, Grace Kelly, Thelma Ritter, so I do not hold a grudge. And for the record, I do find my response to be a bit overheated.

Finally, that my letter was not printed motivated me to write ‘Adventures in Paradise’, a witty, sometimes scathing global romp set among the ruins of the tabloids that may be as good as Rear Window … (I hope.)

Dan Hodges does not write for The New Statesman anymore but pens political blogs for The Independent. And as you probably know, I am on Twitter looking for an agent for Adventures in Paradise, its sequel, and Kelmscott Manor, a Pre-Raphaelite mystery.

Thanks for checking in @europabridge.

For Your Consideration … Teddy Bears or Assorted Ridiculous Things by europabridge

01 Saturday Oct 2011

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Hello all … europabridge here … scribe, and author of ‘Adventures in Paradise‘ the Hackgate screenplay, and other various projects.

Let me introduce you all to a teddy bear I traveled some 100,000 miles around the world with …

His name is (unremarkably) Teddy, but I say it with an English accent which somehow makes him seem more appealing.

I tried Nigel and even Aloysius but decided Teddy suits him best.

He drove all over Scotland with me, stayed in hotels in London, Copenhagen, Stockholm, and pretty much all over the United States.

At present, he acts as a buffer on my head at night to block out the sounds of cretins who don’t understand the sacred quality of peace and quiet, or as a compress when I cannot sleep or sometimes as a pillow … Very multidimensional, that bear. Teddy’s ambitions? To start his own line of cashmere bespoke teddy bears for Marks & Spencer.

He has some wonderful ideas about how to create his own family of teddy bears to be given and shared, and then passed down from generation to generation.

But he may have to wait a while until my film’s in production, as we will need seed money for Bespoke Cashmere Teddy Bears. English accents have that effect. Try them, and you’ll see.

They take over your life, and next thing you know, you’re writing screenplays for English actors for films set in London – with locations on Brides Church, Fleet Street, Eaton Square, Belgravia, Upper Brooks Street, Heathrow, Gatwick, The Thames, Bond Street … not to mention Cambridge, Lake Geneva, Cornwall, Los Angeles, Santa Barbara, and various luxury island locations!

You’re sitting around for eight to ten hours every day trying to create the perfect screenplay (Adventures in Paradise), so that you can take England by storm …

Eat at Claridges … Or have tea at The Lanesborough and check into one of our favorite hotels, the lovely and gracious  Dorchester! …Or stay at The Montague on The Gardens in Bloomsbury …

Get a title, and move into a mansion in a beautiful area …

And visit the Queen.

P.S. Teddy likes Elizabeth in yellow …

Hold tight Teddy!

That’s one ambitious bear … Teddy sometimes imagines his brothers and sisters might be waiting for him, somewhere on the Cornwall Coast … where we want to retire and write screenplays and literary mysteries like Daphne Du Maurier.

He imagines his Cornish Teddy Bear friends are waiting JUST FOR HIM! But when all else fails, Teddy gazes up into the clouds … and communes with the great Teddy Bear God in the Sky … (Images from 5-8 seconds) or sometimes he even says a teddy bear prayer to the Great Scottish Lamb God … (Dear Lamb, please let us live with the Cornish bears!)

These Teddies do seem to be waiting for someone, don’t they?

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Leonardo DiCaprio, Keira Knightley, and Matthew MacFadyen in Kelmscott Manor – A Pre-Raphaelite Mystery …

28 Sunday Aug 2011

Posted by in Film Scripts, Pre-Raphaelite Screenplay Kelmscott Manor, Writers & Writing

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Hello all … europabridge scribe here … reporting from the beautiful city of Boston!Hope it brings me luck.

Though I am on Twitter to report on my screenplay Adventures in Paradise, and to hear from everyone there about their work, the subject of this blog is Kelmscott Manor – my screenplay which concerns the Pre-Raphaelite brotherhood, their art, and Dante Gabriel Rossetti, William Morris, and Jane Burden, who enjoyed a special friendship as key players in the Movement …

Certainly a special working relationship existed in the brotherhood of artists preserved in paintings, architecture, gardens, needlework, and philosophical writings … all about which I began a screenplay more than a year ago, and in Sweden, no less.

(Dante Gabriel Rossetti to the left … See any traces of Leonardo there?)

I wrote the treatment with Leonardo DiCaprio, Matthew MacFadyen, and Keira Knightly in mind … But it was the striking resemblance of Knightly to Jane Burden that struck me first, her ideal qualities for the role, and then something about Rossetti reminded me of DiCaprio too, and I wondered how these two would parry on the screen together.

Matthew MacFadyen then became a natural choice for Morris – a creative genius whose designs and artwork have haunted me for decades.

DiCaprio could make a fine Dante Gabriel Rossetti – a role combining some of the best of his film insights, and hopefully some new essence he has yet to find in himself.

Emma Thompson’s Effie looks at different characters from the Pre-Raphaelite period, though she has someone contesting the rights to her script, which she wrote with her husband Greg Wise (Willoughby in Sense and Sensibility). I’d say these ideas are floating in the Zeitgeist now, as the TATE recently opened a new show exploring the Pre-Raphaelites influence on Modernism.

Kelmscott Manor is a contemporary through-the-looking-glass film with a historical counterpart … meaning all three players, and at least two supporting players are seen in double roles. All the character’s lives mirror each other but also affect each other in a kind of Schrodinger’s Cat physics logic.

It’s inexplicable but somehow likely (and satisfying) that when the 19th Century characters cease, the contemporary characters live on, and learn to live differently partly as a result of the lives on the other side of the looking-glass.

Keys are left for the characters to pick up … And Knightly picks up one such key in her research as a professor at Oxford, which leads to a new dimension opening up in her life with her Rossetti counterpart.

At one point, Knightly (playing both Janes) stares at her historical double, and then walks through a mirror into her other in some alternative pocket in time – where the plot picks up again.

It’s a metaphor for how we interact with ideas and presences from the past who haunt our lives, influence our thoughts and actions, and teach us about our most personal selves. (William Morris above, portrayed by Mathew MacFadyen per my casting.)

Really now … Is it so unthinkable that we might visit these lives in some cinematic version of reality, which is at least sometimes more interesting than our mundane existences?

The film is set in London and Oxford, where the contemporary academic environment, and the historical worlds are played out through parties, discussions, research, creations of art and restoration of architecture, fighting and love-making … all captured in equally beautiful cinematography, and virtuoso acting – in my mind, anyway.

I imagine a film all by itself, and completely original, and yet still bearing some relationship to a Merchant Ivory production, and Joe Wright‘s lyrical Pride & Prejudice. What I’d like to do is get #Adventures in Paradise produced, the sequel #Return to Paradise optioned, and then also option #Kelmscott Manor as a project that might come out in 2014-2015. Obviously, it needs to be produced and directed by people who care about the artistic and cultural developments and preservation in Britain, and people who also care about the dimensions of these characters, who I find fascinating, cultivated, brilliant, and also somewhat indulgent.

This is also the kind of project that would firmly take Leo DiCaprio out of J Edgar Hooverland’s closet – and place him back into the romantic leading crazy-man category. Which he needs, I suspect, and without murdering his wife and children, Shutter Island style. And Leo’s going to take a bullet again in his role as Jay in The Great Gatsby.                                                                                                    DiCaprio has wrapped shooting Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby in 3-D (Bigger & Better than ever!), and I’m in Boston, after traveling for almost two years around the world, while trying to get investors interested in my film scripts, so that I can move to the Cornwall Coast, buy a cottage, and write more amazing scripts and novels … At present, I have a Cornwall mystery planned based on the writing and life of Daphne Dumaurier with Kate Winslet in mind.

Work cures all, when the gods of commerce don’t come through.

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For Writers … A Tribute to Colette … Writer-Vagabond-Actress!

07 Sunday Aug 2011

Posted by in Writers & Writing

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This tribute to Colette is an idea I had after cracking open a book I hadn’t looked at since the 80′s The Vagabond.

I was introduced to her in Southern California by an older friend, which began with the innocent loan of The Vagabond, and ended with my reading until I’d made my way through her entire oeuvre, which includes some 50 volumes.

Along the way, I became enamored of Paris, married a Frenchman — disastrously — and eventually became a writer myself, looking back at Colette with some mixture of skepticism, nostalgia, and love, which is also the way one sometimes regards old friends who become enemies. Or perhaps in the acrimony of a bad marriage, Colette’s own contributions to my life became for a time somewhat tarnished.

Nevertheless, Colette lived a remarkable life.

Growing up in the countryside of Burgundy, raised by a woman who rightly looked upon her daughter as her greatest achievement, she went on to marry a Parisian — Willy — who would lock her up in an attic, and force her (child-labor-style) to produce some talented, and entertaining adolescent books exploring the saucy adventures of one Claudine …

The Claudine books Willy signed his name to, refusing Colette’s authorial rights, which made him a fortune, and a personage in Paris, and Colette a kind of literary slave and ultimate arm-candy.

Eventually they divorced, and she went on to write under her own name, tread the theatrical boards, and become one of the first entrepreneurs of that era — creating her own line of make-up, and merchandizing products the way major stars do today, with her ‘Claudine’ & ‘Colette’ brands.

She was the first woman inducted into the esteemed Academie Goncourt in Paris, but is known, if at all in America as the author of Gigi, a play which launched Audrey Hepburn‘s stunning career on the stage and screen, and Leslie Caron‘s career in film.

Actually, it was Colette who discovered Audrey Hepburn … Spotting the gamine ballerina at the Hotel de Paris in Monaco, she pronounced: ‘Voila! There’s our Gigi!’

C’est tout! A star was born.

I could go on about Colette for quite some time, if for no other reason than her life is so storied … She wrote beautifully, she lived dangerously, she loved outrageously — while sometimes embracing the most time-worn cliches, yet somehow making them seem exquisitely her own.

And she died at peace with champagne on her lips, and a priest’s blessings on her soul.

Not bad for a woman whose very presence in France, not unlike other revolutionary figures in Arts & Letters, provoked debates about the condition of the human soul.

From the juvenilia of Claudine to the full-bodied and wry observations of Lea about her own Cheri, Earthy Paradise — an amazing collection of writings — forms her autobiography and temple. Edited by Robert Phelps, it is a testament to her generous life, capacious person, fine sensibilities, and implacable reason.

Above, a film poster remembrance from Stephen Frear’s effort, and Colette’s most famous creation from the Parisian demimonde — Lea’s Cheri — the young lover who cannot live without his older courtesan. How very French!

An excerpt about writing from The Vagabond follows. No comment needed, Colette speaks for herself, as ‘Renee Nere’. A stirring testament to ‘the old scar that writing represents’, this translation by Enid McLeod is still a bit flowery for my tastes but never mind … The book was chosen in France as one of the best twelve books of the 20th Century.

Read from one of the links below to learn more, and check out Antonia White‘s translations.

I love this photograph … Colette looks like she is in exile, a refugee in her own life.

“To write, to be able to write, what does it mean? It means spending long hours dreaming before a white page, scribbling unconsciously, letting your pen play round a blot of ink and nibble at a half-formed word, scratching it, making it bristle with darts and adorning it with antennae and paws until it loses all resemblance to a legible word and turn into a fantastic insect or a fluttering creature half butterfly, half fairy.

Gigi

Gigi (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

To write is to sit and stare, hypnotized, at the reflection of the window in the silver ink-stand, to feel the divine fever mounting to one’s cheeks and forehead while the hand that writes grows blissfully numb upon the paper. It also means idle hours curled up in the hollow of the divan, and then the orgy of inspiration from which one emerges stupefied and aching all over, but already recompensed and laden with treasures that one unloads slowly on to the virgin paper in the little round pool of light under the lamp.

To write is to pour one’s innermost self passionately upon the tempting paper, at such frantic speed that sometimes one’s hand struggles and rebels, over-driven by the impatient god who guides it — and to find, next day, in place of the golden bough that bloomed miraculously in that dazzling hour, a withered bramble and a stunted flower.

To write is the joy and torment of the idle. Oh to write! From time to time I feel a need, as sharp as thirst in summer, to note and to describe. And then I take up my pen again and attempt the perilous and elusive task of seizing and pinning down, under its flexible double-pointed nib, the many-hued, fugitive, thrilling, adjective … The attack does not last long; it is but the itching of an old scar.

It takes too much time to write. And the trouble is, I am no Balzac! The fragile story I am constructing crumbles away when the tradesman rings, or the shoemaker sends in his bill, when the solicitor, or one’s counsel, telephones, or when the theatrical agent summons me to his office for ‘a social engagement at the house of some people of very good position but not in the habit of paying large fees.’

The problem is, since I have been living alone, that I have had first to live, then to divorce, and then to go on living, To do all that demands incredible activity and persistence. And to get where? Is there, for me, no other haven than this commonplace room done up in gimcrack Louis XVI? Must I stay forever before this impenetrable mirror where I come up against myself, face to face?

Tomorrow is Sunday: that means afternoon and evening performances at the Empyree-Clichy. Two o’clock already! High time for a woman of letters who has turned out badly to go to sleep.”

From The Vagabond by Colette. Farrar, Straus & Giroux, New York 1955

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Larry the Cat @10 Downing Street, A Holiday Letter from europabridge

01 Monday Aug 2011

Posted by in Letter to Downing Street

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Hello All!

europabridge, scribe here … Since it’s the holidays, I thought I’d send some holiday cheer to the Mouser-in-Chief at #10 Downing Street. After all, Larry the Prime Minister’s Cat follows in a long line of felines taken up residence at #10 since the time of WWII and Neville Chamberlain.

And for those of you who have stumbled across my blog, the show-stopping ’Big Ben‘ a Russian Blue is my operative kitty nom de plume just for missive purposes, as I have no cat, much less one named Big Ben.

Rationale for writing Larry the Cat in London? To ask that he authorize me to ghost-write his memoirs … I hear that Larry likes to hang out right in the power center in Cameron’s office At #10 — so just imagine the stories he could tell.

Does David pour a sherry at the end of a long contentious day with Clegg, and sit down to discuss the pros and cons of the Coalition Government with the Ratter-in-Chief? … How about the latest scandal with Andy Coulson, and NoTW or the reunification of Great Britain with the EU? How does Britannia fare? Minds reel.

December 14, 2011

Larry the Cat

10 Downing Street

Or somewhere around the hot-air vent outside the back door @10

Westminster, SW1A2, UK

Dear Larry the Cat,

I am writing to you from the United States, however, I’ve been following your life story, churnalism not withstanding, and thought I’d drop you a line from across the pond.

Actually, I am telling a bit of a fib here. My mom is writing this for me because while there might be a keyboard cat, there has yet to be a laptop computer kitty who writes to Official Downing Street Cats.

By the way, how’s Maisy? (Larry’s girlfriend – right) And isn’t that a name usually given to dance hall girls with somewhat compromised reputations? We wondered if you had caught any mice yet, or are you too busy with Maisy?  

Personally, we loathe rats … Thus, we admire you for your fearlessness but please don’t tell any rats we wrote you, as we’re trying to keep a very low profile … far away from vermin.

Other interesting things about my mom … europabridge, scribe … who is writing this for me:

She loves Scottish lambs wool blankets and cashmere, she loves driving around the Scottish countryside, and staying in 4 & 5 star B&B’ s and Inns and Historic Castles … And she especially loves hotels in London like The Montague on the Gardens in Bloomsbury, and The Dorchester.

She also loves Masterpiece Theatre, and is old fashioned that way. Thought Downtown Abbey was so much fun — who’s greater than Maggie Smith? The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie was always a favorite film.

Cover of "The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie"

Cover of The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie

And finally, she likes a really good Pouilly Fuisse or a good Claret from time to time … I ask you, is that a crime?

At any rate, my mom does not stink, except on some days lightly of the odor of chrysanthemums. I should know, I’m a Cat and I can’t even stand for my litter box to have even one little poop in it.

We heard Margaret Thatcher bought Humphrey (see below), the former Downing Street Cat, a tin of sardines in Germany once during the PM’s travels. How did your own fundraiser go in September? Mom felt so sad that #10 had to raise money to feed a kitty.  And you’re involved in fundraising for the Battersea Shelter for dogs and cats? What a good cause … Although I am a Champion Show Kitty myself, we do not discriminate against orphans of mixed parentage …

Okay, the reason for my letter is this: If you ever wanted someone to write your life story for you, my Mom would be a great ghost-writer.

She suggests the title ‘Cattus Memoria: An Insider-Feline’s View of Number 10′. I suggested ‘cat’s eye view’ as I thought it more compelling but we’re still going back and forth over this.

Think about it.

A cat has his own particular way of viewing the world, and many people cannot be cured of their love for the furry little things, mom included, so be in touch … Ratter-in-Chief.

For instance, how much sherry does Cameron really drink at the end of a long day? Any monkey business going on? How about Clegg? Does his preference for existential literature lend a certain somber cast to his days at #10? Does he really own a French chateau? If so, when can we come and visit?

Did you ever bite Andy Coulson? I beat you did! What about Darling? And do you chase Osbourne around, and demand a pay cut, so you don’t have to run a charity to buy a tin of sardines?!

You should be eating Beluga Caviar, Larry!

Finally, do take your own baths — or do you have your own man-servant or Kitty-Attache?

Please write back after the Battersea fund-raiser, and tell us how much tuna you raked in … And say hello to the Prime Ministers for us as well, as we support both, insofar as an American woman and her imaginary house cat can support the Prime Ministers of England.

Cheerio, Best Wishes & Happy Holidays!

Your pal, ‘Big Ben’

P.S. My mom has written @NickClegg to ask that #10 buy you a modest townhouse for the backyard, so you are not forced to sleep on a vent.

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